You've got a lot of heart, I hope to see more.
Unfortunately, I found the voice acting unbearable. She needs to learn a lesson about inflection and another about characterization. Oh, and another about recording quality.
Here's a suggestion.
Excellent story and characterization, all that I can suggest is that you clean up the animation, and maybe add some music behind it since there isn't any real voice acting going on. That will make it feel more full and dynamic.
Stamper... What the fuck, man?
It was a very nice idea, but the progression was extremely slow, and I only found it moderately amusing.
I love you!
You have such an amazing style in your animation, voice acting, and stories. Keep dishing them out and I'll keep stuffing my face.
Apologies in advance for jumping into this series in the 3rd installment (I'll get to the others, promise). This was great in nearly every aspect, the animation was fluid, the voice acting was incredible, etcetera, etcetera. Rarely does something on Newgrounds provoke some real emotion in me, this surely did: "What are little boys made of?" I really appreciate the contrast of characters.
The only thing that was par was the music. It didn't add/subtract anything to/from the work.
What a horrible waste time.
My inflated 0.02 USD
I appreciate the quality of the voice acting (although I thought Darnell's voice was lacking character the quality was decent enough), but the lip syncing was just lazy and the characters never visually showed any expression. This is like looking at a picture of a picture- the entire story was 2 people sort of telling a story, well, show me that story.
I heard a fly buzz-- when I died
In spite some jank similes (i.e.as blue as dolphin tears) and volume spikes (in between characters) I adore everything about this work. The story, the art, and the voice acting where all great. I caught several allusions in the writing including Emily Dickenson, Rudolf the Red Nose Reindeer, and Donkey Kong.
I hope that this will become a new collaborative standard for Newgrounds.
Hey, there, nice commentary! Finally some criticism aimed at me rather than the technical issues I know too well about!
The "jankyness" of the similes are partly intended; it became so ridiculous trying to think of one-upping descriptive qualities for her ("a dress spun from the finest silk of 1000 spiders", for example, would have been considerably less useful) that I decided to go for complete camp instead. (I mean, surely you didn't think "shone like the centre of an Oreo" was a great romantic declaration!!! Hahahahaha!) Plus, it managed to convey something visually interesting that Nacho + Ceci picked up on and ran with gusto (notice the teardrop pattern on her dress).
I'm happy with your comment, though; it's a personal thing, writing, and we all have different views on the values it should uphold. On this work I tried to make something with heart but also with humour; I'm pleased with what I delivered and glad that in the main it worked for you.
As for the volume spikes; good call, no-one's mentioned that yet but I've had a sneaking suspicion. Some of the characters are meant to be a bit loud, but I could probably do a better mix in the studio. Cheers for a helpful critique!
The references were fairly incidental (although I am the biggest fan of video games), and though I get the Emily D reference you pointed out, I don't see this having much to do with her take on the spiritual rot that comes with death. Flies get around in all the media, you know! As a side note though, when Joey was providing some of the sound effects, he did offer me a fly buzz I'm sure was from the IHAFBWID animation (short and fantastic piece of work http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DzK0mQ ER28A). It was too surreal for this... sounded very eerie.
Naturally I hope that more people start combining their talents for increased benefit: many people could deliver so much more with a good team. I also hope that we start to attract more writing, artistic, vocal, audio and programming talents of the calibre witnessed here, so that we can raise the collective standard on what constitutes a great submission.
Most importantly though, I hope we start attracting more viewers like you, who appreciate what we're trying to do and welcome us with such open arms. Thank you very much!
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